The explanation of life

On the first day God created the dog.
God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at  anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of  twenty years." The dog said, "That's too long to be  barking. Give me ten years and I'll give you back the other ten". So God agreed.
On the second day God created the  monkey.
God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make  them laugh.  I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The  monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so.  Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And  God agreed.
On the third day God created the cow.
God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said,  "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty." And God agreed  again.
On the forth day God created man.
God  said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty  years." Man said, "What? Only twenty years! Tell you what,  I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back and the ten the monkey  gave back and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?" "Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."
So that is why  the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves; for the next  forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years  we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren; and for the last ten  years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life  has now been explained to you...
                            

Mama has a point... :D

Mrs. Jenkins comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner...who lives with a female roommate Vikki...During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty Anthony's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, Anthony volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Vikki and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Vikki came to Anthony saying, "Ever since your Mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote: (This is cute)

Dear Mama,

I'm not saying that you 'did' take the sugar bowl from my house, I'm not saying that you 'did not' take it. But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

Love, Anthony


Several days later, Anthony received a response email from his Mama, which read:

Dear Son,

I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Vikki, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she were sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the sugar bowl by now.

Love, Mama.


---- Lesson of the day ..... Don't Lie to Your Mother -----

A Poem For You (special thanks to My-Long-Last-Best-Friend Putie.. luve u girl :D)

There are times in life...

When the person you will love,

For the rest of your life.

Walks into your life.

Sometimes, just sometimes...

You hurt that person,

You push them away.

Not meaning to,

But you do.

Because you do this...

You lose that person,

They walk away.

At times...

You are afraid,

To go on, after this.

But what choice do you have?

All you can do...

Is hope that one day,

If that person really was the one.

You will meet again.

And if, just by chance...

You get that second chance,

Remember the past.

Learn from your mistakes,

And never let them happen again.

And by doing this...

You will find out,

That a lifetime of happiness awaits.

If kisses were water, I'd give u a sea,

If hugs were leaves, I'd give u a tree,

If spaces were love, I'd give eternity,

And if u are true and sincere to me,

I'll keep all my love just for thee.

And every morning when you open your eyes,

Tell yourself that it is special.

Every day, every minute, every second is a gift from God.

You've got to dance like nobody's watching,

and love like it's never going to hurt.

People say true

friends must always hold hands, but

true friends don't need to hold hands

because they know the other

hand will always be there.

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